Archive for July 2008

To My Sons and Daughters

July 23, 2008

I am proud of you. I love you. These two things you can always trust to be forever unconditional and forever true.

The world is a beautiful and wondrous place. Look around you, and always strive to see the beauty in everything.

I entrust the task of protecting the beauty of this world to you.
I entrust the world to you.

I believe in you, and there is nothing you cannot do.

There is no problem in life which has no solution. There is always a solution. If you are ever uncertain as to what to do, always do what feels right. “What you feel is never wrong.”

Memorize this old saying, and read it to yourself everyday when you wake, and each night before you fall asleep. “I shall pass this way but once; any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness that I can show to any human being, let me do it now. Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”

You must always strive to help others. Help them, no matter the circumstance, and remember that kindness is never unwanted. Especially kindness that is sincere, and honest.

Make the most of each day. If you ever say to yourself: “I have done enough.” Ask yourself, honestly, if there is more that you can do.

Find out what the most important things to you are in this world. Now love those things. Love them limitlessly. That way no matter what happens you will always love what is important.

Remember always that you are important. Without you, the world would not exist.

And finally, be happy. Never expect anyone else to know what will make you happy. Find that which makes you happy, or create your own happiness from what you have.

A Sad Story

July 23, 2008

This is the story about a hero who lives under an overpass and his princess.

Most people don’t quite see it.
They close their eyes and hold their breath.
Waiting for an ending that never comes.

It’s the start. Not the best of starts, but its the best I’ve got.
Start. Pause. Rewind.

This is the story of a.. It’s a story anyways.

The leaves crunched ever so softly. The sound of his own footsteps gave Garret renewed confidence. I am still here. He thought to himself. My footsteps are proof. It was dark and the world was silent except for the steady crunch under his feet. With a laugh Garret spun around twice and fell to the grass. Leaves exploded around his body and floated away.

Minutes passed as Garret laid and smiled. Tonight was it. He knew it. Every single star in the sky winked at him and he laughed. None of them were as bright or as beautiful as her. Sighing happily he sat up and pulled the leaves from his hair. It was almost time.

Jumping to his feet he began running toward the park. The glint of the moon shone off of the metal slides. A light skip was in each of his steps. She would come tonight. He was sure. He picked out their favorite swings and sat down thinking of the last time they sat and talked until the sun came up. Her smiles and laughs and the way her eyes held his.

He would tell her tonight. He would hold her hands and lean forward. She would close her eyes and for a moment the world would stop. All that would move would be their hearts and the promise on their lips. And after an eternity they would part. Their eyes would open and she would smile and rest her forehead against his.

A car approached down the street. Garrets held his breath. The car drove past and its headlights shone off of their tree. On its bark a single heart and two letters sat. Laughing Garret got up and walked over to it. D+A. He traced the letters with his finger and decided they should write their initials on a tree so neither of them would ever forget this night.

He never forgot any of their nights. The last was 4 months ago, just before he went away with his father. She had hugged him just a few steps from here and told him she loved him. He told her he wish he didn’t have to go. He had meant it. This is where he belonged. Right here, in this park, under this moon, and in her arms.

She had cried a little and he had held her until the morning. Then kissed her on the forehead and pulled away. Their fingers held until the last moment. He had to turn after a few steps, and watched as she ran towards the road, he promised her. He yelled it to her, I will come back! Meet you here in four months! He had even sent her a letter. Telling her how happy his dad was with his new job, and how none of the parks here were as wonderful as theirs.

Oh how she would smile, he promised himself tonight he would dance with her, alone, to the beating of their hearts.

He heard it then. His whole body went rigid. Crunch crunch went the leaves. Slowly he turned towards their sound. Everything was a blur, he felt like he was in a dream. Oh how he dreamed of this moment.

There she was.

Her hair blew in front of her face and her hands sat in her pockets. For a moment Garret couldn’t move. He couldn’t decide whether to shout in joy, laugh, smile or fall down. His feet moved towards her, every step closer made her that much more real. He stood in front of her now. She just stared at him. He stared at her. Her eyes were red. As though she had been crying. Without a word Garret wrapped his arms around her and held her close. She hugged him back so tightly he felt as though no one had hugged him before.

She cried then. He didn’t know what to say, so he just kept saying it’s okay. It’s okay.

She finally stopped and pulled away and looked at his face. Her fingers traced his jaw. He smiled and told her how beautiful she looked. She laughed and called him a liar and punched him lightly on the chest while she looked at the ground. After several moments he leaned down to smile at her and cheer her up. She looked away when he saw her face. The words came without thought. What’s wrong?

She told him then. All the secrets and things she held inside all those times. Four months was too long. He left her, and she needed him. The things her dad said, the way her mom would scream. The way she would huddle and cry. His heart hurt, and he wanted to make all of it go away. To make things better. He was sorry he had left. But then the words came out.

I am pregnant.

She had met someone, he helped her and told her she didn’t need to stay there. He was older. He lived on his own and she stayed there and.. things happened.

I am pregnant. She said.

The world stopped.

She cried some more. It turned out that the story wasn’t over. She told him of how he had called her names and told her the child wasn’t his. How she couldn’t go home. Couldn’t go anywhere. He barely heard it.

I am pregnant.

Flashes of her telling him she loved him fluttered through his mind. I am pregnant. Crunch. She yelled at him to say something. All of his words stuck in his throat. His throat hurt. Everything hurt.

Eventually she left. As soon as she was out of his sight it was as though time continued on again. His legs gave out and he knelt in the leaves. The sun came up later, his eyes were red and his insides heaved.

The story doesn’t quite end there. There is more to it of course. About how he saw her again, and helped her. How he refused to go home, and dropped out of school to help support her. There are some good parts in it.

The end though is that he now lives under an overpass. His princess lives with another man who went to school and she claimed is ten times better than him. His daughter barely rememberes him. Some say the stories different. That his princess took her life and her childs. That he cried and turned to the drink.

In the end a couple things remain true in every telling.

Somewhere in some park two initials sat on a tree.

And somewhere two people who love one another go different ways. For better, or for worse.

A Knights Pledge

July 23, 2008

Under the same sky,
In the here and now.
A hero in your eyes.

This is my pledge,

With all of me,
All I can be,
I will be your knight.

Champion of your dreams,
Preserver of your love.
A shield against all lies.

Hold your arms wide.
I will catch you if you fall.

Hold your heart high.
I will lift you above it all.

Your secrets I will guard.
Your honour I will defend.
I swear I will be there until the very end.

If I am the the sword.
You are the scabbard.

Your wounds I will heal,
Your hurt I will feel.

I say to you,
Together we are one.
And can never be undone.

You are my will,
You are my dream,
You are my heart,
You are my everything.

I ask of you,
Protector of my heart.
Guardian of my soul.

Accept my hand,
And hold my pledge.

Secret Lovers

July 23, 2008

He says the words she hates to hear
He says the words, I love you dear

She believes half of what he says
So he stops speaking with his words
And starts to speak with his heart

Never knowing the right thing to say
She wants things to turn out her way
To stop the games he plays

She wants more than he can give
All he wants to do is live

She wants more than a pat on the head
just to be assured she is not dead

They dont need to sleep this night
They only need each other to hold tight

No one will know if they stay in bed
No one will know the words they have said

He wants to do more than pat her head
She wants to be the one he runs to
Not the one he runs through

His rock, his confidant
Her kiss, his only want
His touch is what she needs
Her eyes are what he reads

Lost in a sea of ecstacy
they dance under the covers
no longer secret lovers

She says the words he hates to hear
She says the words, I love you dear

Wishes

July 23, 2008

I wish I could just touch the sky.
I wish for you to never cry.
I wish I could understand why.
I wish no one would ever die.
I wish there was no need to sigh.
I wish that I had said goodbye.

Sunshower

July 23, 2008

I want to slow the world down,
just so I can catch up to you.

I would chase some things forever.

This moment could be our very last
and I don’t want it to ever pass.

Your eyes light up.
God I miss those times we used to talk
just to hear one another’s voice.

Maybe we all fall in love too fast.
I could take a look into my past.

I was always chasing.
I was always out of breath.
I was always breathless.

You had my attention.

The best was always when
we didn’t have anything to say.
We would just smile and then
we laughed until it didn’t hurt.

You used to say you would never be cool.
I used to say I was a love struck fool.

We used to lay under the stars together.
We used to tell them,
to lie here under you,
is all we could want to do.

I used to blush when I gave you that look.
You would tell me that my face was an open book.

You had my attention like the flowers have the sun.
I would drink from your light until I grew beautiful.

I could have been, I could be, I could become.
Anything, but never your sun.

Quiet.

Settle.

Everything has become so gray.
A little bit farther away.
A little bit harder each day.

Clear it up.
Need to clear it up.

Got to get ready now.
Need to dress up in my finest masks and torn capes.
Don’t forget to hide the scars.

This moment could be our very last
and I don’t want it to ever pass.

I want to stand in warm rain with my arms spread
and my mouth open while I wait for the right time.

A Heroes Worth

July 23, 2008

A glance on the dance floor.
You look across at me.
We laugh and spin and roar.
In a warm drunken state.
Dizzied by your kindness.
Whirling I cant see straight.

A smile you cant ignore.
A thought too good to be.
As my heart starts to soar,
I think this must be fate.
This feeling is the best,
My god your just so great.

A hope for something more,
So I will shout in glee.
I will let my tears pour.
Smile, because I will wait.
I’ll never love you less,
I hope im not too late.